NEWSFLASH: Real Estate 101 for Army Officers

In an unprecedented move Pakistan Army, the 7th largest army in the world, has introduced a new course to be taught at Pakistan Military Academy at Kakul. The course is titled Real Estate 101 and will be compulsory for all those entering Kakul. As this will form the heart of the officer corps it is thought to be imperative that they have the basic knowledge to deal with the real estate that they will acquire later on in their careers. In light of the introduction of this course, compulsory English Language courses have now become optional as it is felt that regardless of the courses offered the officers continue to speak their unique brand of English.

Advanced level real estate courses are now being devised for the National Defence College in Quetta where senior officers were initially taught the art of higher military strategy. However, due to popular demand NDC is now rejigging the course to include the real estate courses. Pakistan has not fought a war since 1971 and it is felt that rather than specific skills such as infantry, artillery, intelligence, or mountain warfare the officers should be better equipped in dealing with the real estate that is distributed to them in recognition of their efforts on the battlefield. All ranks higher than Colonel would be allocated a ‘Real Estate PA’ to deal with all their real estate needs.

This initiative would also make the Pakistan Army the ‘first’ in something for the first time since Pakistan’s independence. More details coming shortly -MicroPakistan

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8 thoughts on “NEWSFLASH: Real Estate 101 for Army Officers

  1. Hakim: I really liked this satirical piece. Lord Byron once said that “Fools are my theme, let satire be my song.” In that sense I think you have made a salient observation by employing the medium of satire. Satire works best if it has some connection with reality. That is, your satire captures the essence of what is blatantly visible to everyone who lives in Pakistan. Army disproportionately owns a sizable amount of land in Pakistan and dispenses it to its officers without any compunction at prices which don’t reflect one hundredth of its actual value. It is wrong and very vulgar indeed.

  2. In one of the recent passing out parades at Kakul when the cadets took oath that they would not interfere in political activities of the countries and would hold highest regard of the constitution, the audience present at the ceremony started laughing.

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  4. Real Estate 101 for Army Officers? Hahaha why am I not surprised? Well at least they’re finally being efficient in what they’re doing: Teaching the cadets how to do the wrong thing, the right way. Got to give them props for that. Cannot wait for further details on this piece.

  5. I strongly support handing over the country to Fouji Foundation. This will end constitutional haggling and turmoil. My thesis is that by doing so every Pakistani will have the right to enjoy “some” benifits rather a select few. Call it Islamic Communism…. or whatever but it will streamline politics surgically (or put to sleep for good).
    Do we have any other alternative besides a C-in-C leading the country for seven years or so followed by a civilian interim governemnt until a new tough guy comes on board…?

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